Crispy's Alternative Christmas Song

Caution: May Offend Christmas time is here again What a lufferly time of year The festive spirit enters us No not from round the rear It makes us do all sorts of things That later we may regret Like give money to charity And kiss wrinkly old aunt bet Its the time for giving gifts And spreading joyous cheer And mooning Christmas carolers As a result From too much beer You end up snogging some ugly tart Under the mistletoe And feigning suprise at the Socks you got from stingy uncle joe. Dont forget the queens speech Catch it at three Why not do it in the nude Lizzie Make things interesting wont you agree? Oh Christmas time such a lufferly time Make sure your kids are in bed Forget to put out the prezzikins And claim that santas dead P.s I actually LOVE Christmas :P