So I met The Mittani at EVE Vegas 2017

I set out to EVE Vegas in YC 119 in the best spirit of the event, to meet new space friends. Through a friend I found myself in the midst of the Goonswarm dinner, in a German beer hall - certainly far from the demure settings I normally inhabit. Unlike their reputation, both popular and historical, the Gentlegoons I met were personable, friendly, and accepting of my non-Goonself. Perhaps the most overt sign of nonacceptance was the picture of the iconic fatbee, defecating upon the cracked visage of a Circle of Two logo, enshrined in plastic, at every reserved table. I myself am a simple pilot, ascribing no great association to myself. I was enjoying the night, the new friends, the stories and the camaraderie. Then, there he was, standing before me in a beer hall. His radiance was clearly superior, and in the dim light of the beer hall the halo about his head shone such that it took me a moment to realize what was transpiring. Before me was, pbuh, The Mittani. Being in public, his guards did not see fit to violate me for his safety as they normally do those brought before him as spais or members of outside groups. Here in this simple setting, he bent over at the table, I say the table, for I could not call it mine. It was reserved in the name of Goonswarm, which is naught but another name for The Mittani, is it not? I had the presence of mind to begin recording this once-in-a-lifetime meeting, as The Mittani, pbuh, asked me if I thought he was pretty. He, asked me? My throbbing member struck zipper, a painful reminder of the limitations of my present reality. With the last firings of the travel-worn neurons in my brain, I croaked out my reply in the affirmative. He smiled, and then the woman behind him took a paddle and smacked him in the rear with it. The room erupted in a roar, I was certain she was a goner. But The Mittani, he grinned, and bowed. She could not have known how close to the end, the endless void, she had been. Were it not for his good graces... I shudder to think of the ramifications. Some things are best not known to mortals. Though still opaque to me, it appears this feat of total dominance over pain was a Goon means of asserting leadership. And The Mittani, pbuh, did not flinch in the slightest. And that is how I met The Mittani at EVE Vegas in YC 119.